Still Proud To Be An American

So we have a new president, and it's not who the majority of the U.S. population wanted.

Is it a shock? Yes, I am still in disbelief that Trump was elected.
Am I going to let it effect me? No, absolutely not.

This may come as a shock to many people to hear my opinions regarding our new President being that I am a Mexican American woman, two of the groups targeted by Trump. However, that doesn't take away from me being proud to be an American.

As a Mexican American, I am not worried. Not because I was born a citizen, or because I am third generation, but because I am a firm believer of "if the shoe fits, wear it." As a Mexican American I have already broken barriers many assume aren't able to be broken because of my nationality. I attribute these accomplishments to the fact that I didn't allow myself to be set back by stereotypes or different treatment.

I've read so many people's accounts on their experience with racism toward them and it's a horrible thing. I know this because it's happened to me. I grew up in a predominantly Mexican community that is even called Little Mexico. Everything around me was Mexican, everyone around me was Mexican, and everyone was able to speak Spanish. By the time it came to my final year before high school my parents decided they wanted me to attend a better school than what was available to me, so they decided to move. In order for me to attend this great high school we moved to a small suburb of Chicago which at that time was about 3% Latino, 97% Caucasian. My new high school had a Latino population of .03%, which wasn't even more than 30 students at the entire school worth.

I remember my first day of school like it was yesterday. I was so angry with my parents because they were making me go to a school where I had no friends, knew not one soul, and was considered an inner city transfer student. My first day felt like I was Cady Heron from Mean Girls, no friends, eating alone, and feeling out of place as I was now the minority. To make matters worse I went through something I had never in my life experienced, racism.

It was the first week in English class and of course I was stuck in the class with about half of the football team that seemed to have too much energy all of the time. We're discussing the list of books we were required to read the summer prior to school starting and as it was my turn to give my feedback a boy in class mutters "wetback" loud enough so the entire class and teacher can hear. The teacher seemed mortified and embarrassed, almost didn't even know how to react for the first few seconds. The teacher then told that student to leave the classroom and wait in the hallway. She excused herself for 2 minutes and they both came back. That boy in class still had a smirk on his face, but didn't say anything for the remainder of the class. Once class was over he hurried to walk by me and says, "you dirty spick, what are you even doing here."

As a 13 year old Mexican American girl who had never in her life experienced such treatment, I froze. What do I say? How do I even react? I said nothing and kept walking. I remember going through the remainder of my school day numb. I didn't tell my parents because I knew they'd be upset and I didn't want to make a big deal of it.

A few months later during lunch hour a girl came up to our table (which by now was filled with all of the Latinos in our lunch period) and said "1 down 9 more to go." She was referring to the student who had just been expelled from school for not living in the district, he was Mexican. Situations like these continued and we even found out that our secretary's and administrative offices were hanging up on any person that called inquiring about enrollment who had the least bit of a Spanish accent. During my time there I occupied myself with my passion for journalism and would go straight to work after school. A group of friends created an organization for Latin American students at our school so we had a safe place to go to, but wasn't recognized by the school officially until 3 years later.

Now, as a woman I have faced sexism in almost every job I have held, but I'd have to say the worst was in Texas. That shouldn't come as a surprise for those who are aware of Texas and their conservative views, but for me it was a struggle to deal with the sexism in the workplace.

Regardless of the racism and sexism I have experienced in my 27 years I have not let it stop me from pursuing any dream I've had. I have not used that as a crutch to stop myself from wanting more. I have not used that as an excuse as to why I didn't get certain promotions or jobs. I have not allowed those experiences to define me as a person.

Yes, I am a Mexican American woman, but I will not let those two factors be how a person perceives me. There have been too many instances where I have heard, the system isn't built for us, it's not easy for someone like me to achieve my dreams. Here is my message to them...

The system is built for everyone, but is it easier for some than others? Yes. Do you let that stop you? No.

I am not naturally smart and I admit that so what I did was push myself harder to achieve a higher education in order for me to succeed professionally. I pushed myself hard in high school in order to have a certain GPA to get into a good college. I pushed myself hard at the university I attended in order to take what I learned in class and apply it in the real world. The system may not have been "built for me," but I worked the hell out of it and I made it.

By making it I don't mean I'm by any means 100% successful. What I mean is I made it based on my personal feelings toward my accomplishments and I'm not done, I'm not where I want to be.

Each and everyday I push myself a little bit harder to achieve the things I still yearn for in life...a beautiful home to call my own, beautiful children to be a mother to, and financial security in order to breathe a little easier.

The bottom line that I want everyone to realize is you are not being held back by anyone else but yourself.

As a woman of faith, a woman who believes in God, I cannot sit here and be a hypocrite to the injustices we are all witnessing in this country of ours. There is so much hate in this world and although Trump's actions may have influenced groups of people to speak out or act out, don't let it get the best of you.

My response to the message I keep seeing pop up on my social media feeds that read "if you are not one of the targeted groups you have no say," I am part of the targeted groups and I will not allow that to bring me down. It's not always easy to turn the other cheek as we should be, but we can use it as a tool to build us up and fuel our motivation to make positive changes in the world.

Pain, defeat, anger, sadness, and confusion are all understandable emotions to feel for those who were against Trump becoming President. As I have mentioned to those closest to me, let's not allow this to turn us into those we were so strongly against prior to this. Let's rise above it, pray for the best, and continue to spread positivity. After all, God teaches us to cast all of our worries on Him. We cannot be true people of faith if we do not believe that we are taken care of at all times. God brings us the happiest of times and carries us through the worst of times.

Fight for what you believe in, but let's remember to do so with dignity, respect, and with everyone's safety in mind.

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Cast your burden upon the Lord and He will sustain you; He will never allow the righteous to be shaken. - Psalm 55:22

Over This Election...

Trump is a racist businessman with no qualifications to run for POTUS. 

Hillary is a lying politician who should not be allowed to run for POTUS. 

These two lines have been said in so many words regarding the two candidates for POTUS throughout this entire election and it's all we can seem to focus on. Elections have always been known to take jabs at the other candidate toward the end of the election, but it seems this entire election has been just that. 

I'm so sick and tired of seeing countless posts on social media of people belittling or sharing memes made to make the candidate that they are strongly against. I understand the frustration, I really do, but do we really believe that sharing a meme of Donald Trump morphed into the body of a pig, or Hilary Clinton half naked in a bathing suit is serving any purpose? Does that really help the young individual who is finally of age to vote and is stuck between the two make their decision and basing them off of your posts? 

So many grown men and women acting like children by posting such things is just sad in my opinion. It makes me wonder what happened in the last few years, where did we go wrong, when everyone started to point fingers and make it so public?

Most Americans today will admit this election is one of the scariest, if not the scariest, and their decision has probably not been made. My honest opinion, I haven't felt 100% on either as well and it's the toughest decision to make. 

My suggestion to everyone would be to post less negativity and start sharing positive messages regarding your candidate of choice. 

Yes, we know the downfalls each candidate has. 

Yes, we've heard how many times Trump has made indecent remarks toward a group of people. 

Yes, we've heard how many times Hilary has lied while under oath.

You know what I have not heard yet from most people? Why they are choosing their candidate. 

So here is a question I would love to pose to everyone who loves to share negative things about the opposite candidate, what do you LIKE about your candidate of choice? When answering that question, feel free to create a post with a list of reasons why your candidate is your choice. This way when those who are still stuck in the middle can read what each candidate brings to the table that they might not have already known. 

Remember that no matter who you are, you have an influence on someone, at least one person out there who looks to you and you may not even know it. Again, I understand the frustration, but the mainstream media has already taken the job of posting the negatives about each candidate, let's work together as a whole to start building each other up, not tearing each other down.

Am I upset about what each has against them? Yes of course, but I'm also upset that as a country we're not taking this more serious and are allowing this to tear us apart even further. We're better than this. 

The Joys of Being a Godmother

"So we were talking about baptizing the baby and we want you to be the Godmother." 

I'll never forget the day my uncle asked me to be the Godmother to my beautiful Godson. I was not only surprised, but so humbled and proud to even be considered. He went on to say that he wanted his son to have a strong and motivated Godmother to look up to, but he already had me at we want you...

Since I had been asked prior to him being born I couldn't wait until his arrival. The day he was brought back home with his mom I was itching to get off work and see him. Here I am, below, still dressed in my work clothes holding him.

Since the day he was born I had such a strong attachment to him that I can't quite explain. It was as close to the feeling of being a mom as I can honestly say I have felt. 

For the next 4 years I made sure I was there to see him growing. I would ask my uncle to let me take him home for a day or even a weekend. To this day I'm truly surprised they trusted me taking care of him overnight being that I wasn't a mother and was only  20, but I'm glad they did. 

I say 4 years because once I moved to Texas it was incredibly hard to spend the quality time I was used to spending with him being so far. His 5th birthday was the first birthday I wasn't there to celebrate with him, but I did send him a present and made sure to FaceTime my sister as he opened it. 

During our times together I would take him to the park, which interestingly enough I was able to be the first person to take him to a park and go down his first slide. We'd go to Chuck E. Cheese, walking around the town, get ice cream, or just watch movies at home. I always joke around and say that my Godson has put me through almost everything that a mother would go through with her child. 

He has been sick with me overnight. I had to get up at 4 am as he was projectile vomiting on me, bathe him and rock him to sleep as he cried. He has had explosive diarrhea to the point where he pooped all over my bed, pillows, his clothes, and my arm which then caused me to have to bathe him and of course throw out all of my sheets and pillow cases. During my friends baby shower that I took him with he decided to attempt to throw a tantrum by wanting to throw himself on the floor because he didn't want to leave. I had to give him a nice butt warming for that one, which I can honestly say was the best decision I made during that episode because to this day he has never tried it again with me.  

Now that I am back home and he is now 6 years old I make an attempt to see him more often so that I can be there for him whenever he needs someone aside from his parents. I want him to feel comfortable to come to me as he gets older with any issues that may arise. I pray that I'm able to teach him how amazing God is and instill our Catholic values in his everyday life. 

My Godson, my little corazon de melon, 6 years old now and so full of life. He's so energetic, so happy, loving, and considerate. I'll never forget the time we were walking back home from getting a cookie at a local bakery and just before we were about to cross the train tracks he extends his little arm out to block me from continuing to walk and says, "wait Titi (Tia in Puerto Rican Spanish), let me make sure there are no trains coming so you can go." My heart just melted right there and had to bring him close to squeeze him from how much love I felt at that moment. 

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To know wisdom and instruction,

To discern the sayings of understanding,

3 

To receive instruction in wise behavior,

Righteousness, justice and equity;

4 

To give prudence to the naive,

To the youth knowledge and discretion,

5 

A wise man will hear and increase in learning,

And a man of understanding will acquire wise counsel,

6 

To understand a proverb and a figure,

The words of the wise and their riddles. - Proverbs 2-6

From Ms. to Mrs.

"So how is married life treating you?"

"I don't know, nothing is different. I'm happy, he's happy, we're both incredibly blessed."

In two more days it'll be one month since my husband and I legally married and I have to say, not much is different. I've been asked how married life is too many times to count on one hand and each time I don't know exactly what it is the person expects to hear from me.

My husband and I have lived together for the last 3 years and I believe that had a lot to do with my feeling no different since our our status went from domestic partnership to married. The one question that I'm sure many might want to ask but fear it may be offensive is if I'm pregnant. It's an understandable assumption for anyone to have considering we originally planned a traditional ceremony and reception and had last minute change of plans.

Nope, still not pregnant and still no desire to become a mother yet. Maybe after our church wedding the desire will kick in. For now, I just plan to enjoy my husband as much as I can and be selfish because I know for a fact that once we have children he is going to be the most amazing dad and give all of his attention and affection to the kids. Which, don't get me wrong is a great thing and I'd be blessed to have, but stinks for me as I'm used to receiving it all. Selfish, I know, but I don't think it's wrong to want to be someone's everything after getting married.

I will say this, the biggest change I have noticed is from my in-laws. It's as if once we were married they returned to the way they were with me when I first started dating my husband. I don't really know how to explain it, but I feel welcomed again. I'm sure it has everything to do with the fact that I am now officially their daughter/sister-in-law, but it has felt amazing.

The gut wrenching feeling of not knowing what might be said, how am I going to upset someone now has completely vanished and I'm beyond grateful. I look at my new family and instantly filled with gratitude.

I pray that for as long as I'm alive I'm happily married to my husband and continue to build a strong relationship with my new family.

I Am Yours and You Are Mine... 9/17/16

As of 5pm on Saturday, September 17, 2016 I am officially and legally married!!!

Words cannot describe the immense happiness I felt walking toward my husband with my two cousins at my side as he was standing under a beautifully decorated gazebo standing next to my sister and brother-in-law and the song Turning Page played. If only I could capture the look on his face as our eyes were locked with such emotion behind them. Happy, excited, anxious, blessed, and all around bliss!

To be honest, I can't even remember exactly what the justice of the peace was saying during the actual ceremony because I couldn't help but smile the entire time as I stood in front of my love. So many thoughts and memories were rushing through my mind as we stood there... How did I get so blessed? My love looks so handsome. Aw my honey is crying, but hold in your tears because you'll ruin your makeup. 

Laughing together from pure happiness!

We chose to get married through court in Las Vegas before doing the big traditional wedding as originally planned for October 1st of this year. Many factors played a role in our decision to make this change. I just felt so many people on the outside felt the need to share too much of their personal opinions on a wedding that wasn't there own. So one day I told my now husband that I couldn't take it anymore, all the negativity toward something that we both wanted for what was supposed to be the happiest day of our lives. 

So there we were, lying in bed one night when I mentioned, "what if we get married in Vegas instead and do a big wedding next year when we have more time to plan it the way we want to?" He turned to me with his eyes wide open with a tone of excitement and said, "I was thinking the same thing but was afraid to mention it in fear that you'd be upset because it's not traditional." I'm sure we both let out of a sigh of relief realizing we were on the same page and so began the non traditional Vegas wedding!

We decided on only inviting our bridal party and save the family and friends for our Church wedding next year. This way we could have our bachelor/bachelorette parties the night before our ceremony, kill two birds with one stone.  We then chose a venue for our ceremony which featured an evening ceremony performed outdoors in a gazebo for up to 10 guests. My sister was my maid of honor and his brother was the best man. My two closest cousins were my bridesmaids, and walked me down the aisle. My friend of 12 years was a groomsman, along with my sisters boyfriend. 

The day couldn't have been more perfect. We had perfect weather, a beautiful set-up, and the love and support of our bridal party. 

Here's to hoping for smooth planning for our Church wedding next year! :)

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4 “Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’[a] 5 and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’[b]? 6 So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” - Matthew 19: 4-6

Admitting Your Faults

Admitting your faults to those closest to you is a hard thing to do, but admitting them to yourself is even harder. 

Just the other day my fiance and I had a disagreement and he said something that he usually says after an argument, but this time it struck a different chord then before. "Whatever you say, like always..." he muttered as he walked away. As much as I wanted to say something back, like I always do, I stayed quiet. This triggered me to reflect on our disagreements and really think about whether I listen to his side or not. 

Having more time to reflect on life lately led this to be my next topic to reflect on the last few days after that disagreement. Have I always disregarded the wants of my partner in relationships? Do I always push to get my way in arguments? Am I always this selfish?

The answers after finally having to admit them to myself were most of the time I have disregarded my partners feelings, I do always push to get my way, and no I haven't always been this selfish. There was a time before my first heart break that I was a completely different person. I was kinder, more caring, and completely selfless. 

I'm aware that as the years went on and I was thrown into the crazy obstacles of life it slowly made me less trusting, less compassionate, and more attentive to my own needs. I'm not happy with the person I have become, but I have slowly been trying to shed these burdens and let God handle it. Definitely easier said than done, but I am trying my hardest to remember the much nicer person I was before this harsh world altered me. I can't blame it entirely on the obstacles I've faced because ultimately I made the decision to be this way, but it took a toll. Each day it feels like all the harsh realities of this world make it less hopeful that things can change for the better. 

Blunt, judgmental, inconsiderate, one-sided, jealous, lack compassion, negative, selfish and controlling. 

These are all of what I consider to be my faults. I wouldn't say I am all of these all at once or even all the time, but I have tendencies to act on each of these at times and I despise that I do. 

Considering these faults I wouldn't say I'm a bad person, but I have started to notice that I've lost sight of my true self with having gone through difficult times in the last year alone. I know my good qualities outweigh the bad, but my goal is to slowly eliminate the bad altogether. 

My greatest blessing is knowing that I can always ask God for guidance and knowing He is always there to listen to my concerns, pleas, and woes. It took me deciding to leave a job for unethical practices and having an extremely difficult time finding a new career to reflect on these important issues I've been turning a blind eye to. 

I've learned that in order for me to be the best daughter to my Father God, wife to my future husband, and happy with the person I myself am that I need to work harder than ever to be the person I once was before. Work harder toward being the happy, compassionate, considerate, selfless, loving, and open person I once was not only for those closest to me, but to be happy with myself each day I wake up and look in the mirror. 

I have to keep reminding myself that the unfortunate events I've gone through do not define me and they don't have to change me, I can and will overcome this and come out on top. You can to if you find yourself in a similar situation. 

5 Ways To Start Vacationing Every Year

Vacationing each year is something I've done since I was a baby, thanks to my parents who made it possible up until now.

This is definitely not a blog post on how to save money in order to vacation because there are tons of articles/blog posts out there with a ton of great ideas. Only you know how you can best save your own money based on your income and what is left over for you to set aside.

This is a how-to on what to look for when vacationing in popular tourist attractions/destinations. One of my favorite places, and one I get asked about frequently by those who know me, is Orlando (Disney World). However, these tips can be used to vacation to other popular destinations such as Puerto Vallarta, Cancun, Cabo San Lucas, Bahamas, etc.

First, I'm going to ask you to remove any and all negativity that you have heard about how much money you'll spend, how extreme the weather is, or anything that anyone has vented to you about their experience. Remember that it's only that...THEIR personal experience, which can differ from person to person.

Here are a few tips on how to save during your vacation in order to be able to afford taking at least one each year.


1. Use bundle deals on applicable websites (Expedia, Priceline, Spirit, etc.).

I've used this option myself twice now and saved me so much money. The first was my trip to Cancun in 2011 with some friends. We used Expedia and paid $500 per person for the airfare and resort stay for an entire week. Most recently my family and I used Spirit to book our airfare and resort stay for my uncle's wedding in Cancun. Although it was still pretty pricey, $540/person, we still saved a lot by booking it as a bundle package. Always make sure to browse under a private browser window so that the websites won't read your IP address and hike up the prices, since we all know they are in cahoots together. 

2. If you know someone with a timeshare, ask to purchase 1 week from them or visit this website for amazing and affordable deals (sales presentation required).

Fortunately for me, my parents purchased a timeshare when I was young and have since then paid it off. This means that my sister and I are able to use their timeshare through an amazing resort exchange company called RCI to book five star resorts anywhere in the world. If you know someone who has a timeshare I'd definitely suggest treating them to a nice dinner and casually asking them to buy a week of theirs to take advantage of the beautiful resorts available for use to timeshare owners. Of course this comes at a price, but will not compare to the insane amount of money you'd pay to book a hotel that doesn't have a kitchen, washer/dryer, or multiple pools. The beauty of owning a timeshare and more information is coming soon on another blog post. 

3. If the destination isn't more than 15 hours away from you, and airfare is expensive, consider driving.

Many times we get caught up with life and some trips may be last minute decisions. This then means that with less time until your vacation, airfare becomes a heck of a lot more expensive. Although I myself am not a fan of road trips, if your vacation destination isn't too far from you, driving may be the most cost effective choice. Think about it, you'd only spend money on gas (which if you don't have a gas guzzler won't mean too many trips to the pump) and you now have a car to travel with during your vacation. That for me is the BIGGEST plus on a vacation, especially if you're going somewhere that has multiple attractions that you have no choice but to drive to. For example, my nearly annual trips to Orlando always require a car during my week stay because all of the parks are at least 20-30 minutes driving distance from each other. Although the resorts we stay at offer free transportation to the parks (another great perk about timeshare/resort stay) my family and I always like to go to dinner after at our favorite Mexican restaurant in Kissimmee, El Tenampa (highly suggest trying it). During our time in Texas we drove back and forth, a lot! This was a 12-14 hour drive, depending on how risky we wanted to be in hopes to not get pulled over, and literally only spent about $150 on gas round-trip. If you're a couple, that is almost one airfare ticket. If you're a family of four, you're saving at least $400 on airfare. Definitely something to consider. 

4. Search for online deals for activities prior to your trip to save by booking online.

Theme parks, kayaking, swimming with the dolphins, ATVs, excursion tours, para sailing, jet ski's, and so much more that so many of us can't wait to do during our vacations. If you have ever done any of the mentioned activities or something similar, you're aware that the cost seems a bit high for the activity. However, being that it's a vacation spot, they know people will pay premium dollars to experience something like this away from home. There are tons of companies that offer these services at your desired vacation spot and many have discounts for those who purchase in advance online. It can be anywhere from 10-30% off the regular price. That in itself is saving a lot considering it'll already be paid for once you arrive and it won't take away from the cash you set aside during your vacation. Always check Groupon as well, they usually have a ton of stuff available not only for activities, for getaways as well. 

5. Take advantage of those unbearable sales presentations that are always being offered.

Now I know this is the most unpleasant of the steps I've listed, but hear me out when I say IT'S WORTH IT! Is it ever the 90 minutes that they swear it will only take? No. However, if you're firm with your decision to not purchase the entire process will go by much quicker than you'd imagine. Do not let a pushy salesman deter you from raking in some cash or scoring free tickets to activities/theme parks! Think of it this way, you go through this anywhere you go nowadays. You go to your favorite retail store and they ask you if you want to sign up for their credit card. You go to the bank and they say, it looks like you qualify for our premium so on. You go to a mall and are approached by the kiosk owners to try their products. It's something we go through often and we don't even realize it. Why not take advantage of the presentation and if anything look at it as this. You schedule the presentation in the morning, always in the morning, and they give you free breakfast. After the free breakfast, and many have amazing buffets, they take you on a tour of their beautiful and luxurious resort and you get to see how timeshare owners spend their vacations in what is bigger and more beautiful than the average apartment. After the breakfast and tour they proceed with their sales pitch. If it's something you are genuinely not interested in, then by all means say no and explain why it's not for you, they thank you for your time, and send you off to retrieve your gift just for attending.  The best part about it, you have the entire rest of your day to enjoy the free gift you just received! 

During my last vacation to Orlando my fiance and I did four presentations, yes four. So for four days out of our seven days there we had free breakfast, money we didn't have to spend out of our own pocket. One of the four presentations offered us extremely discounted Universal Studios tickets, we paid $300 for TWO 7-day park-to-park passes for both Universal Studios and Islands of Adventure. They don't even sell 7-day tickets on the website, just for ONE 4-day park-to-park ticket you pay $400 plus tax. The other three presentations we received $100 Visa gift cards, so $300 in total. My fiance and I made $300 while on vacation! That definitely helped us celebrate this vacation in particular since he proposed to me while we were there at Islands of Adventure. 

These 5 simple steps can help you and your family ensure you take the deserved time off and away from home each year. It's very much possible and I encourage everyone to get away once a year, and if a one week vacation is too much there are always short getaways available. Make sure to check out the link to check those out. Here it is again, be sure to check out the hot vacation spots and amazing deals!

Always remember, vacations may cost you a portion of your savings, but the memories you will make you'll cherish forever and are PRICELESS!