It is definitely apparent that we are no longer in the era where the man was the head of the household for every family structure. With women being more independent and waiting longer to marry or have kids, it's definitely given us women the upper hand in what happens in our lives. That includes when we are in a relationship.
I am an educated 24 year old who started working at 14, studied journalism at DePaul University, bought my own car at 20, moved out on my own at 23, landed my first job at a big media company at 22, now work for the most respected and established media and publishing company in Chicago, and I pay all of my own bills. I would definitely consider myself an independent woman who hasn't had to rely on a man to take care of me in any way possible.
With that being said, I haven't always been the most tolerable woman to date. I've mentioned that I was mean to my ex of almost 7 years and I truly believe it was because I knew I didn't need him. He was not as motivated as I was to move up in life and he was very much content with staying at his job that still paid him only $9/hour at the age of 21. Of course this isn't a bad thing at all, but having been at the same company for years I expected he'd want more. By the time I was 18yrs old I was making over $10/hour and would always strive to move up the ladder and make more money. I would be the one to pay each time we went out, he never took me out to any nice restaurants unless I planned it, and quite frankly he wasn't the ideal man I wanted for myself.
The way I viewed it was that if I was a hardworking, educated, and independent woman who didn't expect for a man to take care of me in anyway then I'd want for the man to be on the same level. Since I don't expect to be taken care of financially, my desire was to be taken care of emotionally. However, one of the hardest aspect I've had to deal with being an independent woman has been submitting/subjecting myself to the man.
To be honest I wasn't quite fond when I was reading the Bible and came across Ephesians 5:22, Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. That is the interpretation in the New American Bible, but in older versions they use submit instead of be subject to. I didn't want to understand naturally being the woman I am, but after God sent me a man who made it easy for me to want to do so is when I began to understand.
In many cases that I have encountered in my own circle is that the man is the breadwinner who provides for his own. This meaning that the man pays for the major bills such as rent/mortgage, utilities, insurance, etc. Although the woman might work they don't have to worry about whether bills are getting paid. In this situation I see that women are still mistreating their men, talking bad about them, bringing them down. I have yet to experience being taken care of or not having to worry about paying any bills, but I do try to give my person the respect he deserves. I do get frustrated at times, but I refrain from belittling him and making him less of a man.
When I notice that I have an attitude and acting more mean than usual I just remember why I love him. Before he came into my life I prayed to have a man who gave me his all, who loved me unconditionally, who showed me affection, who was loyal, honest, caring, considerate, attentive, and most of all loved me with all of my flaws. God gave me all of that and more when Mando came into my life. That definitely helps me to take a step back and realize what I have. I truly appreciate the man I was blessed with.
When you catch yourself wanting to bad mouth your man just remember the following...
If your man is going to work each day to provide for you and your children (if applicable)...BE GRATEFUL.
If your man pays the majority of the bills and your main priorities are the groceries/small items...BE GRATEFUL.
In many cases that I have encountered in my own circle is that the man is the breadwinner who provides for his own. This meaning that the man pays for the major bills such as rent/mortgage, utilities, insurance, etc. Although the woman might work they don't have to worry about whether bills are getting paid. In this situation I see that women are still mistreating their men, talking bad about them, bringing them down. I have yet to experience being taken care of or not having to worry about paying any bills, but I do try to give my person the respect he deserves. I do get frustrated at times, but I refrain from belittling him and making him less of a man.
When I notice that I have an attitude and acting more mean than usual I just remember why I love him. Before he came into my life I prayed to have a man who gave me his all, who loved me unconditionally, who showed me affection, who was loyal, honest, caring, considerate, attentive, and most of all loved me with all of my flaws. God gave me all of that and more when Mando came into my life. That definitely helps me to take a step back and realize what I have. I truly appreciate the man I was blessed with.
When you catch yourself wanting to bad mouth your man just remember the following...
If your man is going to work each day to provide for you and your children (if applicable)...BE GRATEFUL.
If your man pays the majority of the bills and your main priorities are the groceries/small items...BE GRATEFUL.
If your man does all the "manly work" around the house such as taking out the trash, fixing broken things, changing light bulbs, etc...BE GRATEFUL.
If your man comes home to you each night after a long day at work...BE GRATEFUL.
If your man tells you he loves you each day and tells you your beautiful...BE GRATEFUL.
If your man takes you out whenever there is time to show you how much he loves you...BE GRATEFUL.
If for any reason other than what I have mentioned above makes you realize that you have a wonderful man, who although has flaws just like you do, loves you as you love them then be grateful.
Ephesians 5:22-33
Marriage Like Christ and the Church
22 Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. 24 But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything.25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, 26 so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless. 28 So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; 29 for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, 30 because we are members of His body. 31 For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and shall be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. 32 This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church. 33 Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband.
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