TrichotilloWhat?

Trichotillomania is a hair-pulling disorder that 3.4% of adults, mainly women, are diagnosed with according to Psychiatric Times. Medically considered an impulse control disorder, it is something that is uncontrollable. Not only are you not able to control it, you don't even know you're doing it at times. This hair pulling disorder can mean that a person is pulling out hair primarily from their scalp, eyebrows, eyelashes, or any other part of the body. 
I started with trichotillomania when I was about 12 years old. My parents were the ones who noticed it first as I was doing homework and pulling my eyebrow hair at the same time. What you are you doing? My mom asked me with a shocked look on her face. Oh, I didn't even realize I was pulling my hair! I said as I was just as shocked as she was. 
It's been 13 years since then and it's a disorder I still battle each and every day. I would go through phases when it was so bad that I had to color in my eyebrow because I literally would pull the entire last half. I would have to say that up until this last year it's calmed down. I still pull here and there, but I notice that it happens most when I am stressed. As I mentioned earlier this past year has been filled with so many blessings that the stress that does come my way is easily forgotten and overshadowed by my happiness. 
The worst part about having trichotillomania is that there is no treatment for it. There are organizations that can help you deal with it as you'd go see a therapist to talk over your problems with, but no medial cure. For me it was something hereditary, as my mom also has it and has been suffering with it for much longer than me. It is comparable to a bad habit such as biting your nails or grinding your teeth, but this definitely causes more emotional stress. This being that once you pull all of your hair you feel ashamed, embarrassed, regretful, and frustrated. However, during the actual pulling it's like a great sense of releasing stress, it's incredibly hard to explain and even harder to understand. 
In my situation, the pain feel so good. Sometimes I knowingly do it because I am stressed at work to feel better and release stress. It's that feeling of relief like having an itch and scratching it. Most times I do it unknowingly if I'm bored, tired, or stressed. It is known that those who have trichotillomania often times may have other disorders such as depression, anxiety, or obsessive compulsive disorder. It just so happens in my case I've had all three in the span of my 24 years. 
I suffered from depression when my parents were in the midst of their separation/divorce and when my grandfather passed. I suffer from anxiety from time to time due to an unknown heart condition I have where I feel like my heart skips a beat and I can't catch my breath. It's something I've dealt with since sophomore year of high school. 3 heart monitors and various tests later, still no answer as to what it is. Lastly, I do have OCD when it comes to certain things.
What keeps me going is knowing that my health issues are not life threatening and could be worse. Although the heart thing might be in the future, I am healthy now and that's all that matters.

Here are 12 facts provided by the website Pull Free at Last Trichotillimania to help you understand the disorder a bit more beyond my personal description:

1. The majority of Trichotillomania sufferers are girls and women, though men and boys suffer with Trichotillomania, as well.
2. Most suffer in silence and hiding, terribly embarrassed by the disfiguring condition.
3. Compulsive hair pullers typically pull just one hair at a time. 
4. Some compulsive hair pullers pull hair out for hours each day.
5. Many compulsive hair pullers wear hats, wigs, false eyelashes and makeup to cover their missing hair, eyebrows or eyelashes.
6. Some compulsive hair pullers experience times of spontaneous relief from the condition, only to have it return again months or years later.
7. There are no statistics on the number of children suffering with the problem.
8. Children as young as 12 months old have been reported to compulsively pull hair.
9. Trichotillomania is NOT an Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD).  Trichotillomania is medically classified as an Impulse Control Disorder.
10. There currently is no medical cure for Trichotillomania.
11. There currently is no medication or medical or psychological therapy that consistently provides long term relief from Trichotillomania. Nor does hypnosis or Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) consistently provide sufferers with relief.
12. Some child and adult hair pullers ingest hair, which can cause a dangerous, intestinal blockage called a “trichobezoar.”  Those who ingest hair should be evaluated by a medical doctor.

This just goes to show that you never know what a person may be going through. I used to be so cruel, so harsh, and judgmental by assuming things of others. Yet, I never stopped to think what others assume of me. With this knowledge of something you might not know people suffer with, it'd be nice to think twice next time before assuming and/or judging someone for something you may not understand.

He said to them, "You are the ones who justify yourselves in the eyes of others, but God knows your hearts. What people value highly is detestable in God's sight.- Luke 16:15

You judge by human standards; I pass judgment on no one.- John 8:15